A girl who loves words

I did it. I finished. And now I have to get it out of me before I can forget it all and the real world folds up these feelings and locks them inside.

I finished Mockingjay. It's not the first time I've read it, nor will it be the last. But maybe it's the first time I really read it. Maybe it's the first time I really tried to read every word on those pages.

The same things still irked me. I didn't like the militaristic feel of the book, the confusing imagery of the Capitol. But the book took on a whole new meaning for me. I guess I can pin it down to Prim.

The moment when I absorbed every inch of that book came with Prim. The moment those bombs went off and I knew Prim wasn't coming back. I knew Prim was dead. It hurt. It hurt so much is was ridiculous. I had to remind myself Prim was fictional, she never existed. But isn't that the beauty of these books? That you can feel these characters personalities and lives taking shape right before  your eyes? That they can touch you in a way you had no idea was possible? With just simple words! Simple words on a page that tell a story.

I guess it was actually Katniss that hurt. I felt like Katniss - for no other reason than she thought like me. Not in the sense of survival, or hunting, or how she analyzed peoples every move. It was more of the way she thought when she came out of her deathly state after the explosions that killed Prim. Her words and hurt described a deep unquenchable pain. She couldn't stop that pain, she ran from that pain. Buried herself in closets and silence and guilt because of that pain, because she couldn't face it. It was just like me I guess, that's what made me feel pain too, because she was in pain - and after reading seeing everything she went through, how is it possible to stand much more? 

I'm not good with words. How do I describe how that pain effected me? But do I even have to? Surely you understand too. You understand how her pain was my pain, and undoubtedly your pain. 

The moment when Buttercup comes back was probably the worst. I lost it then. That poor cat that Prim loved so much, that Katniss loved so much because Prim loved him. It was the words and the frustration that came from those moments that touched something deep down. It punctured a wound in my heart and I cried. I don't cry in books, I can tell reality from fiction. But that didn't stop the tears coming fast and thick, with sobs that hurt my throat because I didn't want anyone else to hear them. It was in that moment that my heart went out to a fictional character, because her little sister was gone and never coming back. Her world was gone.

And it was her words after her mourning and her grief that brought even more tears. Somehow she had the will to move on, to try and get past what was holding her back. She wrote a book, a book about her loved ones and the people she knew and missed, a book about the despicable actions of the Capitol and the horror of the Hunger Games. Somehow those few pages made me cry for hours, because I felt the pain of a girl who wasn't real. Only in books did her heart beat, only in books did her soul grieve. But mine grieved with her, beat with her, hurt with her.

You'll have read this and think I'm a crazy super fan, but I'm not. I'm just a girl who loves words. Which is why I love Peeta.

But thats a story for another time.

Why did you love the books?

I like Peeta bread.

Maybe it's just because I've been re-reading the Hunger Games for the first time in years, but I've suddenly developed an urge to bake bread.

I'm being serious, I honestly can't help it.

Normal people shun chores like cooking and baking, they'd rather clean toilets. Not me! I'd rather be in the kitchen molding that dough into two fine specimens of delicious warm bread.

I'm actually making myself hungry, so I'll leave you to surf the web somemore whilst I go eat delicious bread and settle into another good book.

xoxo

ps - I'm leaving for Lake Tahoe skiing on Saturday! Probably won't be posting for a good week, hope to see you back here soon :)

It feels like rain

via

These pictures remind me of my rainy springtime mood.

Don't ask me why, they just do.

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hope you had a deliciously rainy day

xoxo

Monday Mornings

Good Morning :)

Today's Monday Morning post is in honor of The Hunger Games

A LOT of the blogs I follow are all doing Hunger Games DIY's - which I'm in love with.

I am a Hunger Games fan, but I'm not gonna lie. Harry Potter was not only written better, but it was a better plot. Sorry Hunger fans, I'm a HP fanatic till death. But here are the things floatin out on the worldwideweb about the Hunger Games;

This is LITERALLY PERFECT

You can buy this beauty here

I've literally been drooling over this tutorial.

Must. make. Mockingjay. shirt.

One of my favorites Etsy stores sells these; Necklaces and charms with book pages in them. They also have Harry Potter, Pride and Prejudice, and Alice in Wonderland. (Pretty Little Charms)

This tutorial is fantastic! I'm probably going to make one for my friend for her birthday... shhh it's a secret!

Also, G*rated is having a give-a-way on Rae Gun Ramblings - go check it out!

Seriously. What are you waiting for!? GO!

This cute party decoration tutorial can be found on Rae Gun Ramblings as well!


Of my 50 bajillion options, these are the ones I liked best. Please contact me if you have any more Hunger Games ideas! 


cloud9dreamer2ATgmailDOTcom


xoxo


EDITS: look guys! I found more!

tutorial on how to make this class master Hunger Games shirt can be found here.

printable buttons!

1. Twig arrows 2. Effie inspired flower
3. coal necklace 4. bookmarks
(collage via)


as you can see I refer to the same sights over and over and over again to steal my creative genius from.
aka I'm not creative at all. sigh.


I would love to here from you about your favorite part in the Hunger Games series! Also, e-mail me with any DIYs you did or saw. Schmanks.

Knead some Dough

Last night I went to my weekly ACT math tutoring chill session (yuck. math.)

But instead of doing math last night, we made bread.

Lucky for you I've got the recipe!

Delicious Bread:

5 (1/4) cups of bread flour

1/4 cup of sugar

1/2 tblsp of salt

2 tblsp yeast

2 cups of hot water

combine and mix a little with a spatula, make sure to get the flour mixed up so it doesn't stick to the bottom

Then continue mixing in a KitchenAid

2 tblsp of Soy Lecithin

Continue mixing in the KitchenAid, add more water if needed - at this point you CANNOT add more flour. Let it mix for 7 more minutes.

In the meantime, Pam your bread pan/take a break.

After the 7 minutes, take out the dough and split it into two. Spray PAM onto your counter and mold your dough into a ball

smoothing it out and tucking the edges into the bottom.

Then stick into the pan (which should also be covered in PAM. We really love PAM).

Let it sit for about 15 minutes. After the 15 minutes preheat your oven to 350 degrees, and then cook it for 25 to 30 minutes. 

Cinnamon Bread

There are really only some minor additions to the above recipe.

During the 7 minute mixing time; melt aprox 1/4 cup of butter (we added some vanilla to it as well - mmmm yummy)

And in a separate bowl we mixed up some spices. I can't remember what we put in because honestly, we just threw stuff in there.

Next we rolled out the dough until it looked like a square

Then we spread around the butter and vanilla using a.... paintbrush. Or something like that

Next spread the spice mixture AAALLLL over the dough

And fold in the side edges

And roll up the dough from one side to the other

Push in the last edges so nothing slips out of the dough

And tuck into the pan

Let it rise for 7 minutes, then cook it for the same time as the normal bread.

This bread tasted absolutely amazing. I'm actually going to go make some more right now... 

xoxo

ps- it tastes good with jam.

pps - Sorry if the pictures are blurry... my camera is on the fritz and the one I was using is evil.

Monday Mornings

Yet again, another Monday Morning's post in the evening... sigh. One of these days I'll get organized to actually post this at the allotted time.

Today's post is an outfit post. Because let's be honest, our lives revolve around clothes. It sounds conceited and maybe a little preppy, but think about it! When you get up in the morning and get dressed, how long does it take you? Maybe it only takes you 10 minutes (I envy you), or an hour (you should envy ME) - but what you wear each day is important.

Currently we've been having strange weather here in my hometown. But that in itself isn't exactly unusual. Our weather is messed up - and today was a high of 68 degrees! But it rained all day. 

I'm wearing my African safari pants (H&M). They're loose, cacky, and cute. I feel so fashion forward in these! But I have to admit, I miss my yoga pants. I'm too lazy for my own good.

And yet my lovely mother consented to hosting a quick photo shoot. Don't you just love her?

I've been dying to wear this cardigan + top for ages. I bought it from Forever 21 and have been saving it for a day when my hair looked nice to wear it. I paired it with my fluffy orange cardigan (from NY and Company) because I'm a fan of people who can color block and I wanted to attempt it. Plus the mannequin was wearing an orange cardigan too, so I figured it MUST be a good idea. 
I just really love the flowery fluffiness of this cardigan, it's fun to play with when you get bored.

I really loved the shirt because of the peter pan collar. Collars are back in fashion and I've been dying to make myself one/buy a shirt that actually has one! That and the perfect teal color goes well with my skin tone - and although I'm not usually a fan of polka dots, these dots were just so non assuming that I couldn't help but love them.
The shoes above are my prom shoes! I thank my gullible father for buying them for me, because I tricked him into it. The shoes went well with the dress because they added a little bit of pizzaz and  pop that I like to call "the Madison effect." 

My hair was the challenge of the day. I wanted to do something cute that you can only really do with straight hair, since it wasn't it's normal curl. So I went on my craftgawker lists and promptly found this hair recipe. My history teacher looked at my and said, " I love your hair! It's from a decade that I can't remember, but I absolutely love it! You should wear it like that more often." Needless to say she's one of my favorite teachers. 

And this is my mother. I think this pretty much explains our relationship. Don't you agree mom?


xoxo